Chapter 5

Chapter 5

As expected, my mom called me in for a talk.

Because of what I'd said at the dinner table, she gave me a warning.

Maybe in her eyes, it wasn't even a warning—just worry and comfort. But to me, that one sentence alone—"Do you want to go back to the psychologist for a follow-up?"—was warning enough.

I didn't want to see a psychologist again. Every time I did, it felt like reopening a wound that had already scabbed over—a painful torture.

My birthday fell on a weekend that year. I got up early—though honestly, I'd barely slept the night before.

It was April, and a light rain was falling. The temperature was a little cool. I put on that black long-sleeved dress and went out with my mom.

Seeing what I was wearing, my mom couldn't help complaining. "You just got over a cold—why aren't you wearing more clothes?"

I said quietly: "Ayu liked it when I wore dresses."

My mom fell silent. She just came over, put her arm around my shoulders, and patted my arm gently.

After visiting Ayu, I didn't go home with my mom. Instead, I went to the arcade alone—just like I did every year on my birthday.

Alone, from dawn till dusk.

But today, I ran into someone I knew at the arcade.

At first, when I saw Noah Luo, I thought I was hallucinating—or that I'd mistaken him for someone else. It wasn't until he walked over to me and tossed me a bottle of drink that I came to my senses.

I barely caught the bottle, surprised. "What are you doing here?"

As always, Noah was concise with me. "To play."

I said "oh" and forced a smile. "What a coincidence."

"Don't force a smile if you don't want to—it looks ugly," Noah said, his tone full of disdain.

I ignored the first part and defended myself. "Who's ugly? Your sister has gotten more love letters than she can count since she was a kid."

Noah scoffed—obviously not believing a word of it.

He tilted his chin up and asked: "Wanna bet? The loser buys dinner."

It seemed he still held a grudge about losing to me last time. He was young, but he had a strong competitive streak.

As his sister, I had no choice but to accept the challenge. But I wasn't in good shape that day—I lost again and again.

I felt a little sad, my nose tingling.

Noah, the winner, didn't look happy either. He grabbed my wrist with a scowl and dragged me to the mini KTV at the entrance of the arcade.

"I'll wait for you for ten minutes," he said.

With that, Noah pushed me into the mini KTV and closed the door.

Before closing it, he also stuffed a pack of tissues into my hand.

I stared blankly at the tissues in my hand, blinking. Suddenly, I felt like laughing—but my nose tingled even more. The tears I'd been holding back finally fell, and all the emotions I'd bottled up came pouring out.

I hadn't liked birthdays since I was 12.

Because this day was also the anniversary of my brother Ethan Zhong's death.

Ethan was two years younger than me—the same age as Noah.

To be honest, Ethan and I hadn't had the best relationship. We'd fought countless times over the years—even the smallest things could make us lash out at each other.

My biological dad had died when I was young. Ethan and I had lived with our mom, who was so busy with work she barely had time to take care of us.

Life had tied Ethan and me together. We couldn't stand each other, yet we were also each other's greatest reliance.

I'd always thought Ethan hated me more—after all, I'd always taken advantage of being two years older to order him around.

On my 12th birthday, we'd been playing at the arcade in the mall. I'd told him to go buy me milk tea.

There were several milk tea shops in the mall, but I'd insisted on having the one from the shop outside. I'd been too lazy to go myself, so I'd threatened and cajoled Ethan into going for me.

That was probably the most regretful thing I'd ever done in my life.

On his way back with the milk tea, Ethan had been in a car accident.

I'd read online that about 200 people die in car accidents in China every day. Back then, I'd thought that with a population of over a billion, 200 was just a tiny number.

I'd never imagined that my brother Ethan Zhong would become one of those 200 people on my 12th birthday.

What did it feel like?

It felt like... my heart had been suddenly hollowed out.

For the next two years, I had nightmares every night. My mom had taken me to see a psychologist, and it wasn't until last year that I'd finally started to get better.

The turning point had been when I found out my mom was in a new relationship—and that my future stepdad had a son two years younger than me.

Or maybe... it was just what I thought was "getting better."

I cried for a long time in the mini KTV—using up the entire pack of tissues Noah had given me—before I finally managed to calm down.

Noah had said he'd wait for me for ten minutes, but I'd cried for a full hour. I'd thought he'd long since left, but when I opened the door, I saw him still standing there.

I was flattered. "You're still here?"

"I'm still waiting for you to buy me dinner," Noah glanced at me and clicked his tongue. "You look terrible when you cry."

I sniffled and complained: "Is there any little brother who looks down on his sister like this?!"

I asked him again: "How did you know? Did you follow me? Or eavesdrop on my conversation with Mom?"

Noah looked exasperated. "……Neither! I'm not as creepy as you are!"

"Linda Zhong," he suddenly straightened his expression. "Did you see me as a replacement for your brother?"

He paused, looking a little awkward. "I-I mean... I don't mind, actually. If it makes you feel better..."

I stared at him in shock.

I hadn't expected him to see through my thoughts—let alone that he'd be willing to accept it.

He'd been so cold and distant at first, and I hadn't really done anything for him. This kid was... surprisingly innocent.

Or rather, he was just too kind.

"Noah Luo."

This was the first time I'd called him by his full name. Before, I'd always just called him "little brother."

I stepped forward and said seriously: "At first, that's what I thought. But not anymore."

"You're not like Ayu. You're you, and he's him—you're two completely different people. Seeing you as a replacement for him was a stupid thing I did. From now on, I won't do that anymore."

Noah looked at me without saying a word.

This atmosphere was way too serious for me. I slung my arm around his neck, ruffled his hair without hesitation, messing it up. "But I am really touched that you thought that. Come on, sister'll treat you to a family bucket!"